Aita for taking just my nephew fun places and not my step niece and nephew as well. Tell your nephew that GF is welcome to buy herself a pizza to eat while the rest of you eat the dinner you made. So my (39f) husband goes on an annual ski trip to aspen every year with just his parents, his brother and his sister, so around two years ago back in December of 2019, my sister in law’s babysitter cancelled at the last moment and I volunteered to look after her kids, (10f) and Kieran (17m now 19) this wasn’t a problem for me as our kids are close since they’re close in age. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. She was right in that I didn't take an interest, because honestly, the girl bored me Sunny-Day-6884. As you read in the old post, he wasn't always the easiest to watch and I had to take care of him while also attending my own remote classes. He ruined their relationship himself, you didn't do anything. Like the comments above said, OP knows their daughter, they interact with them daily, there is a trust and bond there, there is daily rules and expectations. NTA - this is the health and safety of your Nephew. Not only is she verbally, financially, and emotionally abusive, she is manipulative and controlling. I (27m) have three of my nephews over for the weekend. Put her in her place by uninviting her entitled self. Ok_Gas139. They do not clean much, if at all and are sloppy in many ways. Simone has Bella 10 and Archie 9. He's only a kid and not my kid, and it's just a garden after all. My brother Casey (32 y. It’s really complicated but my sister went to prison in February of this year for killing her husband. Only you really know which is the more dominant of the two reasons you're not going. Brother is 51 and Nephew is 31. I knew the money would significantly benefit my nephew and niece and that they were already better off than their step and half siblings. You are not required to do a thing for your nephew. My nephew is 13 and my son just turned 11. I am also 6 months pregnant with twins. I just don’t really have maternal instincts I suppose. AITA for having a college fund for my niece and not my nephew. ago. Yesterday Johnny asked me to take him to the park today, and I said I would. Help keep the sub engaging! Before talking to my sister I already discussed this topic with my husband and other people in the vacation group. Sneaks out. I completely respect that. My mom has this "birthday crown" that she has the kids wear when it's their birthday. The boy is 21, lives with my other sister T for the past 6 years. AITA for not wanting my step-niece in my wedding even tho my nephews are? Not the A-hole. AITA for not taking in my fiancée's niece and nephew? No A-holes here. On the other hand, he's sure the child will "certainly inherit George's disturbed traits. If you would have watched them for your parents and one of them even got a scratch, she would be all over you. She has a right to live where she wants and to pursue the opportunities she wants, and you should respect that. I haven’t seen any pictures or recieved any updates. I don't really have time to baby two teens that are just making my life harder. I (19) just had my nephew (5) for a week while my sister and BIL took care of a family emergency. They are not your step niece and nephews. When I found out my sister said the neighbour's kids were coming round, I said they were not; I only agreed to babysit my nephew. They lost their mother and have had a traumatic event and now have a new step family that’s upset they’re lives again. tammy-oe. She adopted them. My house is clean for the first time in weeks. (There were others kids & they had gifts). Some BG and info: My brother is the father of nephew and niece. Recognizing that it is NOT for you and being willing to help financially anyway takes maturity and empathy. Brother was 17 when he had his accident (let's be generous and say only just). I (34M) own a restaurant and I offered my niece and nephew (twins both 18 now) a job at the restaurant during Original Post Aug 21, 2019. When they were 4 their parents went through a very messy divorce and as a result I took them in for 3 years. Throw-This-Away33. mom is pissed at me for even thinking that they are not part of the family well the truth is they are not. They had three teenage children together, and my sister begged me to take her children in together. My brother did send me a picture the night my nephew was born but that’s it. 2. And while it is a mean thing to say, I agree with your assessment that there is always a child in need of an emergency placement situation. My husband, brother-in-law and sister-in-law all work, but I'm still on maternity leave. He does not stand up for his family to her at all. You should make sure he keeps getting therapy and tell your SIL that you wouldn't have to do this if she didn't care about archaic and toxic ideas more than she did the health of her son. Background my bio nephews are (8-10) years old. So here's the deal: I recently moved to the States from Canada on a fiance visa to be with my now husband. While my nephew was outside he did something cruel to my son, I don’t know exactly what it was, my son just said that he used “his thing”. o. I would sit the nephew down and explain that this is for her and her alone and that if he wants, he can maybe have his own weekend with you guys in the Of course uncle is worried about an unplanned pregnancy at this time. Plan 3. ️. As of right now, we’ve got back 75% of the things. We went by my mom's /her grandma yesterday for dinner, cake, gifts. It's not just about the niece and nephew's feelings here, though that's not great either. Subreddit Announcement AITA for not including my niece and nephews in our holiday? Not the A-hole. Now I don't believe they are entitled to my mother's property as they are not a part of the family at all. I love my niece and nephew, but I have no interest whatsoever in changing my plans to bring kids with me on a trip. I was 7 so little bro was 4. Right now she doesn’t. I'm a single parent of two kids of my own, 15 year old girl and 12 year old boy, and we live in another state so it was a big transition for everyone but I felt it was important. youreyesmystars. I’m not going to go in to detail but my brother became a drunk and the mom didn’t I wouldn't let him have cake after apologizing, maybe the next day, but not now. Every summer we go on a wilderness adventure, but four years ago we were a bit worried about being overwhelmed with the newborn and two My nephew will apparently go into foster care if I do not do this, but my husband and I have chosen to be childfree for all the reasons that are hindering us from taking in nephew. Now, that there's a second baby coming, my mom and sister are trying to get me to help out a lot more with my niece. They acted like absolute terrors most of the time. I can’t take this anymore. AITAH for not treating my niece and nephews as well as my own child after their mom went to prison for killing their dad. AITA for allowing my nephew to borrow more books than my step-niece? Not the A-hole. It has certainly caused so much stress and disturbance. Caden's mom died when he was a baby. They are your niece and nephews. My sister did not handle this well proceeded to involve everybody that would listen. Since my mom regularly provides free babysitting that got them pretty rattled. It's unfortunate, but the way of things. prunepizza • 1 yr. You are a child, you cannot be forced to look after someone else's kid. AITA for not taking my niece on vacation? Not the A-hole. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I did not allow my ex-BIL access to the money saved for his children with my sister while the kids were young. A catharsis for the frustrated moral philosopher in all of us, and a place to… Dec 2, 2023 · According to Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), around 35,000 of young children (under 6 years old) end up in emergency rooms each year because they got into the medicine when no NTA. But agree that the majority is left to your niece to ensure she gets the same leg up as your nephew. The brother is blind to it and OP is being an amazing aunt. I also don’t ask. I plan to hike, drink beer at all the new breweries, go to some baseball games with friends I haven’t seen in years, probably hook up with fit people because the options in Ohio are depressing af, etc. For the niece and nephew, they don't live the same ADMIN MOD. Like, literally every time I see this kid he's wolfing down food. My kids are sleeping through the night. Additionally, they may receive a yearly clothing allowance. My wife and I fought about her letting her nephew stay with us (he's not gay, he just makes stupid choices) and that wasn't even for an indefinite basis. There’s a difference between going out and adopting every orphan in existence and literally taking in the orphaned child of your dead sister. I'm not familiar with your state's foster guidelines, but in my state they'd each receive $600-$722 a month. So, what does a caring uncle do when their nephew is being routinely ignored by their stepsiblings? Take him out for some fun every once in a while! What's the harm there? Stepmom thinks, a lot. My dad says I need to reach out to my brother to set it up. ) He’s married to my sister-in-law Mandy (36 y. I do not support their union whatsoever because she treats everyone around her, including our family, like dirt even in front of my nephew, and he just accepts it. I love my nephew as a nephew, I’m pretty detached but I do love my nephew. 1M subscribers in the AmItheAsshole community. Some background - My girlfriend is incredibly introverted and suffers from anxiety. She’s a single mother so I understand how stressful it can be and I have done my best to always been there to help. That means Brother was 20 when Nephew was born. And there's no rule that you have to take anyone's children on holiday. You could allow niece/nephew to sit on the couch with your kid sitting in their lap under your watchful eye for just a few minutes. So small update apparently my brother had told his wife that I had agreed to watch my nephew for an extra two days so that they could have their little vacation and she not knowing me too well just believed him and texted me just saying thanks which I didn’t question as it was around hour 4 of the original agreed upon 13 hours NTA you did the right thing and your brother absolutely deserved this, I'm sorry for your nephew, he has an evil step mother and a father who's equally as cruel, beyond cruel. I said no. He said he wanted us to use it to buy baby stuff while the kid was young, and whatever I (24F) am currently attending university and WAS watching my nephew, Ethan. Even his grandparents have never had to redecorate a single time because I am the one responsible for keeping my baby out of their things, not vise versa. The week before Christmas, my nephew called and demanded that I drop my dog off with him while he's in town and didn't mention anything about the party. There is also a big difference between letting out a 15 year old who knows the areas and a 12 year old who's not a resident in the area. They're cool kids and I love having them over. I had to take in my husbands niece several years ago. Back in April 2021, my school announced in-person classes were starting again. When my nephew asked if he can borrow a boxed set, I told him yes. Tell your partner that you didn't agree to your nephew living/staying with you, and if he refused to address the issue, he is solely responsible for him. But also surprised since he had given the thumbs up and everything seemed totally normal when I had dropped him off. Reply reply. I had my nephew 19m and niece 18f for Christmas this year. ) and my niece Mya (2 y. MOD. AITA for telling my nephew it's not his birthday. ”. Single-handedly inviting the nephew to stay for good, without talking to her husband, is absolutely a dick move. Still pregnant (about 7 months). I (41M) and my wife (38) have three kids (4,9,12). AITA for making my nephew apologize immediately in front of his friends. This might make me an asshole because he's my nephew and I don't always have the chance to see him. I responded, “No, Aunt Corgi will let you know if she wants that. While my niece and I waited, we were both horrified that my nephew was scared. NgamLuer. r/AmItheAsshole. Every one but us 2 had gifts to open. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! Click Here For Our Rules and Click Here For Apr 29, 2024 · Hi! Of all the things I was expecting to see in this thread I didn't quite expect this lol. This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. AITA for telling my husband that his grown nephew and his GF cannot move in. My grandparents passed away and the house was maintained by their children, making it into communal space for all family members to use. My nephews birthday came up last week, and my SIL mom was sitting with my nephew for awhile. Kid steals alcohol and gets high with her friends. Step-niece is her husband’s 11 years old. I watch my 2 nephews and my niece, 7, 5, and 3, once I've been refusing to help take care of my nephew since he's sick. During that time, she was not my legal guardian, yet she would take all my paychecks, take my phone I NTA. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. I said yes since I know for certain he’s a responsible 18 years old. I called my mother right after to ask about a date and was told that the party had been moved to my nephew's other grandma's house because my mother's boyfriend (83M) didn't want me there. ago •. I 27f and my husband 32m are on holidays with our kids 4m, 3f. He also banned them from using the vacation house and told them my wife and I actually own it, not he and mom. Nope, not excluding her either. Your sister is an asshole person and an asshole mother, to break her children’s heart for her own greed. 6. NTA, your sister needs to get this addressed with the school ASAP and transfer your nephew & give you temporary guardianship. Accusing you of abusing them. Human pregnancy usually lasts 9 months so Brother was probably 19 when Nephew was conceived. My brother married Simone 2 years ago almost and they blended families. Because of this, she is definitely a homebody and prefers hanging out at home with our two dogs. I met with my dad recently who asked me if I met my nephew yet, and I said no. Posted to Reddit's popular "AmITheA**hole forum, using the account u/throwaway63618293, a man shared his AITA for not caring if I meet my niece or nephew. She's not like a toddler either, she's just turned a year old, so it's still a lot of work just dealing with her. The rooms are usually saved for those who visit from out of town like me. Read this before contacting the mod team. We’ll call my brother K and my nephew L. I however understand what a difficult situation this is and im being told my actions are making me the AH. youtube. At my sisters wedding her dress got destroyed by fruit shoots being used as waters guns by new nieces and nephews he day was ruined AITA for wanting to spend time with my niece and nephew but not my sister? I (27f) have a sister (39f) who, for lack of nicer terms, can be completely overbearing. Thanks for opening your arms and home to your nephew. fm/reddit-relations I have two kids under five to take care of. gloomyweeb. I might be the AH because I knew my nephew loves sushi but decided to take my nice the day he couldn’t come Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! Click Here For Our Rules and Click Here For Our FAQ. I was going to post this on AITA, but a good friend of mine recommend I post here for a “sane” response, so here we go. Emotional_Chair_9024. He then argued that I help out with my nephew voluntarily and it’s not fair. You don't give your age but don't suggest plans to your nephew and if your sister asks, don't babysit. Poor kid. Make plans with friends. But It’s not always about being right or wrong. 4. I lived with her from 17-18 (my senior year) due to problems with my stepdad. " He goes on to question the self-esteem of any woman that would date, much less procreate with, someone with "George's character flaws. ADMIN. NTA stay away from her kids. When the firstborn was about two or three, I got an angry message from the mother (not my sister), yelling at me for not taking an interest in her daughter, pretty much saying that I'm obliged to, since we are family. My nephew is aware that I am his biological mother, but we have never had confusing issues before. Weird family dynamics. AITA for not wanting to take care of my nephew? Not the A-hole. And often always takes her AMTA for saying no to my nephew who has shown no interest in driving, using my high-performance car for prom, and saying I might consider it for my niece who has shown more interest in driving and has more experience. It was just the most crushing thing. If that isn't "workable" then offer to pay for an Uber for him to come by himself. L was diagnosed with autism at the age of 2 and is for the most part non verbal, hyperactive and overall a great kid to be NTA. com/c/redditdude?sub_confirmation=1We now also have a podcast, tune in for more stories!https://anchor. I (33m) am staying at my grandparents’ house for the holidays. Update 5 (a year later): It’s terrible. Because they CHOSE to have children. No A-holes here. My daughter's 7th birthday was yesterday. My step kids are loving with their uncle in the same city as me so they can finish high school with their friends. Among other things he told them the grandkids were not welcome at his place indefinitely. All 4 of them spend a lot of money in useless things, so they often have financial problems. You did absolutely the right thing by defending your nephew and making sure he isn't unfairly blamed or burdened with a situation he couldn't possibly comprehend. You wouldn't think it because he's super lank, but I guess he's at that age where it's normal, I've been there. Evil step mother coming out to play. A catharsis for the frustrated moral philosopher in all of us, and a place to finally find out if you were wrong in an argument that's been bothering you. And we had to just sit there & watch. Repost since original story got deleted ,,AITA for not giving into my sisters „simple request“ at the cost of my niece/nephew?“ TW: Emotional Abuse, Gaslighting, manipulation, fat shaming Possible TW for Abortion The OP felt really bad in her own comments and was swaying towards giving into the sisters threats for family. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Now I am not putting any blame on my nephew. Tell us about any non-violent conflict you have experienced; give us both Apr 13, 2022 · The internet is rallying against a man who took his niece on vacation and not his daughter. I usually just let things go and try to keep the piece. If your husband really wants to do this, he needs to be prepared to "use up his leave for that," and not expect you to manage three children alone. My sister thinks I'm being harsh and selfish because I don't like kids, and I don't want any of my own, and she Oh my gosh, this is insane. As soon as we got there, my brother goes to hand me my niece and says “I think Aunt Corgi wants to watch you while I go get a massage!!”. Maybe you need to have a word with your brother and drop the hint that his child's welfare is FAR more important that the relationship he has with Snowwhite's step mother. Apr 16, 2021 · Daily uploads: https://www. We are visiting my family in my home town. Letting him have cake immediately after apologizing can teach that apologizing obliges the aggrieved party to accept their apology and give them what they want because they apologized. It nearly ruined our marriage. He is now 24 and is still leaving at the grandparents home with his GF that does not work and her 7 YO daughter. AITA for not babysitting my niece and nephew in a family emergency? Not the A-hole. If you pretend you feel the exact same way about family vs a random person then you’re either a liar or your family sucks. Go to AmItheAsshole. reubendevries. Last night the baby cried all night, and I got no sleep. My husband and I agreed to pay my nephew and niece to do some jobs for me around the house and they've accumulated a chunk of cash each (niece at £100ish, nephew closer to £500) to check out when they go to university. She is legally their mother. When he wants to play with the step siblings, they walk away and when he actually has fun, his step mum gets mad. That you didn’t value him at all. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! Click Here For Our Rules and Click Here For Our FAQ. Here's the thing! My neighbour's husband is home, and he has the weekend off, and they're his kids. Aita for not taking my niece to Disney : r/AmItheAsshole. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I might be an asshole for making fun of my ne0hew in front of family and make him ashamed. After I finished cleaning up breakfast I said I needed It would be nice though for your niece and nephew to see that you are including the step kids in their fun sometimes. 1. My husbands nephew moved into his grandparents home at 16. NTA Giving your niece a week off because she is stressed from, among other things, taking care of her brothers, is totally fine and should be done without her brother as he might be a stressor. It was so bad that even the cult nearly kicked him out. Yes they are. Backstory I (39M) and my sister (35F), whom we’ll call K, were raised by some pretty boomerish parents. " The idea seems to be that icky George should It might be worthwhile to go to court again to make the court aware that (1) she is telling your son to say he wants something he doesn't want (half brother to come along), (2) she is creating pressure on both you and your son to include her affair child in your custody time. Here's the uncle's Reddit post: 'AITA (Am I the a-hole) for taking just my nephew fun places and not my step niece and nephew as well?' Refuse to give up time with your nephew. Watch every move they make with your kid. We didn’t really fight as siblings, but we were not close. *throwaway *on mobile *English is not my first language *I'll convert tithe currencies to the us dollar since it's a more well known currency. Your brother is a coward and selfish. AITA- Sister is mad because I let my nephew stay with me when she kicked him out. Judgement_Bot_AITA. They seemed to agree with me so I went ahead and told my sister not to bring her son. Rory gave us a check for £1000. My sister N has 4 kids (boy and 3 girls). Have them wash up beforehand under your watchful eye. Hello, for starters I (26F) am the youngest of 3 but this story involves my older brother (31M) and his son (5M). But I am still lost that my sister would just leave, without getting Feb 15, 2024 · chubbybunni1985 said: NTA at all but agree with your farther, maybe leaving a token something so your nephew isn’t left feeling they way your niece does. NTA. It's unfortunate that your sister is going through a difficult time, but directing her anger at a 4-year-old child is not fair or appropriate. There’s obviously a backstory here. I responded and congratulated them. She likes things quiet and calm and definitely thinks of the house as her safe space. This time they spended so much they couldn't afford rent for two months straight, so they had to move. 5. Before my sister got into this relationship, me and my partner used to take her kids out quite a lot, to give her a break from single mumming and also just to spend time with them because we wanted to - I had a rough childhood growing up with just one adult (my mum) in my life and I want to make sure my niece and nephew have lots of safe people Some time ago I started to pull away from my niece and, in general, just helping my sister. EvilUncle1. NTA your nephew needs a safe place and your sister agreed to let you take him. I have never been interested in having kids (I It's not like you're taking one nephew and not his siblings. He then tried to gaslight us into thinking that it wasn’t his fault. He needs to come up with money to pay for the additional food/whatever nephew's needs are, and no, he can't just piggyback on the food already bought, etc. If you can, maybe explain to your nephew why he's probably being rejected by his step-siblings. Hi everyone, I promised that I’d update after my nephew moved in so yeah. 5 and I literally do not expect anywhere I take my son outside my own house to be baby-proofed for my convenience. Subreddit Announcement NTA but your sister is pissed because she wanted you to br the automatic free sitter and is punishing you because she made other plans, thinking you'd take her son to play games. However one of them, “Erik” (14m) has a gigantic appetite. My fiance and I both had a discuss and both agreed that we don't want my nephew at our wedding which will be happening in 2 month. Your brother CHOSE to have children. About 2 years ago I got pregnant and Chris and I told our families. Sister T gave an ultimatum to my nephew that if he doesn’t finish community college, she’s gonna kick Except Sarah. He is 9 and very innocent and naive. AITA for taking just my nephew fun places and not my step niece and nephew as well. I have one niece and nephew (same parents). My brother has an 8 year old son Caden. Chris - my husband (31), Rory - father in law, Sean - my nephew (16), Tom - my brother (35) I (30f) don't have a baby right now. Not the A-hole. ) and they have two kids; My nephew Nick (3 ½ y. These past few days have just been a bit busy with not just this situation but the Ukraine crisis as well (We’re Polish-Canadian) so I’m sorry if this isn’t worded too well. My brother and my nephew's were there too, daughter gets along well with her cousins. ADMIN MOD. Anyways, first the jewelry/clothes. strawberriesancream. He was with their mom Lana for a small period of time and they broke up while she was pregnant with my niece. That supersedes your SIL's authority. I take care of the house and my nephew (10) Johnny. Through online school of my junior year to now a senior in high . At the same time, if her choices make it too difficult for you to visit her, that's on her. If no one in your family takes them in, there's a chance they'll be separated and sent to homes or facilities far apart from one another. AITA for taking back my nephews Christmas present and giving it to my son. As you didn’t help conceive or birth your nephew no matter what they say he is not your responsibility. You can refuse, and tell your parents that if they leave you alone with him, you will report them for child abandonment. Due to the circumstances I am unable to legally work for a couple months while we work on getting me my employment authorization document, adjustment OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: Telling my 9 year old nephew he isn't allowed to pick vegetables from our garden without me or unless he helps. Reply. I should also note that I left the church 10 votes, 71 comments. As my dad and step mum live in a small 2 bedroom unit we chose to stay in a motor inn owned by family friends. MOD • 8 mo. My fiancée's sister and mother just passed away in an accident, and her sister left behind her 6 year old son and daughter, and my fiancée pretty much immediately started talking about flying the kids here to move in with us. AITA for not wanting to babysit my husband's nephew and niece. AITA for not taking care of my autistic nephew? Not the A-hole. My sister and I have always had a strained relationship. We also have a nephew (20) on my side and a few nieces and nephews on her side. Yah your niece and nephew will need support when they are ready to break free from your sister. I have 2 sisters, T and N. just live a good life and try to help them as much as you can when theyre older. We both have sons who are around the same age. I (18F) have been helping my sister (24F) take care of my baby nephew (14m). Last year I took in my nephew, who is now almost 17, after my sister and her husband kicked him out because of his sexuality. It's not about blood relation, but about breaking commitment. I 45 female and getting married to the love of my life next sunday my wedding it going to be a child free environment due to the havoc caused at my sister wedding by the swarm of your children abit of back story. ) Mandy recently asked my parents if I could babysit Nick and Mya, since Mandy wanted to visit her mom and the original babysitter canceled last minute. It is your sisters responsibility to raise that child, and if your mother wants to help that’s her choice. When the kids were 4 and 5 my brother started dating SIL. Here is a truth. Six months ago, I watched my niece (5) and nephew (7) for five days while my sister and BIL were on vacation. It was very last minute. My son is 3. This can be hard. Runs away. AITA for not wanting to invite my 9 year old nephew to my wedding. Bella and Archie's dad died when they were 4 and 5. The kids sound just as bad as the mother does. My step mom never liked my dads kids (me & bro). That's a fair compromise as it shifts the cost of the pizza to her. My nephew is my sister’s 18 years old son. The reason why is because my nephew is out of control, he doesn't listen, can't sit still for even a minute and ESH except the Nephew, the niece for saying awful things, your sister for enabling her at the expense of her other child, the ex BIL for caring so little about this meeting that he showed up high, and you for deciding that your step niece's biology is more important in that moment that the simple fact that your sister was enabling one of her My nephew (20m), my niece (15f), my sister (44f) and my bil (46m) have been living with us for a while. On the third day of them being at my house, we were Sit with your baby on the floor & play with toys, including your niece & nephew. This completely freaked them out - both of my sisters' / families I took my niece to eat sushi without my nephew who also loves sushi. One year, we were forced to go to a christmas event for her family. 100%. ) is much older than me (17 y. Odds are it has nothing to do with him and everything to do with them not wanting any kind of new family. bh um qc re kl lt ra fm pc zv